Pensacola Bound

Well I am done with work for a glorious ten days. (TEN DAYS!!) My family is heading down to Pensacola, Florida for our annual (and yet lately not so annual) family vacation on Saturday. My grandparents actually met down in Pensacola when they were young. My grandmother lived there, and my grandfather was stationed there while in the Marine Corps. There are so many sweet stories about them while in Pensacola (like how the day she met him she went home and wrote in her diary that today she met the man she was going to marry...good thing for all of us that she was right!) So once they had children of their own they would take them there to visit my great grandmother. I know my dad, aunts and uncle all have childhood memories of being there, but my memories start with me, the third generation of Pensacola Beach Dwellers.

I do not remember my first trip to the beach. It just was always there. I remember being little and having the "girls room" in the condo for me, my sisters and all of our girl cousins (there were lots of us). Playing in the sand and diving in the waves. Of my AWESOME heart shaped sun glasses and singing to Debbi Gibson. I have teenage memories of tanning and music and chasing the Marines...or letting them chase us...Memories of girl time with my sisters and cousin. Of how close those weeks together made us. I have memories of being there with Nick and sharing my love of this place with him. Of showing him our places, our memories. But most of all I remember the family time. The memories made with my grandparents. Of how they loved watching their grandchildren on their beach, in their town. Memories of my grandfather telling us stories of being in the Marine Corps with all the grandchildren circled around listening to every word. Memories I now cherish since my Papa passed away. Memories of huge family dinners, of Christmas in July with my great grandmother, of renting out the entire sea-doo shop so the ENTIRE family can go together. Just so many memories of times spent together.

We haven't made the big family trip in several years...too many really. I think it was 2000 or 2001 that everyone was getting older and life just got in the way. Now we are finally going back together. My Nana, three of my aunts, my cousin and her husband and son, my parents, Boo and Chris and me and Nick are all going. We are missing some very important people and family members, but I am so excited to be with the group that is going. We have grown to big for one beach house, so this year we have two next door to each other. This year we also have the fourth generation making an appearance in the form of my perfect Godson Wesley. I am so excited to go, to have the much needed break from work and life and these infertility annoyances, to take in the beach again and just slow down. I am excited to get to be apart of Wesley's first trip to the beach. To be there and see as he begins his memories of Pensacola. I hope when we go back next year he has a couple of cousins there to keep him company and to start life long memories with too!

Not Such a Bad Day

I had planned to write a post tonight about how annoying my day was. About how the power went out at our house in the night so I woke up twenty minutes before I needed to be at work. How I was bleeding and cramping AGAIN and had to call the doctor. How I had to actually go in for another pelvic ultrasound and how the woman said "I can't believe I have never scanned you" and I said, "Oh no, I have had ultrasounds here. Maybe they are under my maiden name" and then she said "ahhh hahaha...yes, I can see you have had LOTS of ultrasounds. Looks like it is just the other girl that always does them." She was very nice, and I really liked her, but it just made me feel a little down. She thinks it is HILARIOUS how many times I get ultrasounds??

Then I waited to see the doctor for over an hour. I finally (FINALLY) got back in the room and the nurse says, "Well...I can see you have called A LOT. Let me read all of these. It will take a minute". I was immediately stung. I wanted to point out that I called on Thursday because I was in terrible pain. I called on Friday because THEY TOLD ME TO. And I called today....one week after this started, because I am STILL bleeding. I didn't say anything. I let her read the notes. She seem busy and overwhelmed and I didn't want to be the hateful patient that snapped back. When the doc came in he told me I have several more cysts, and that they are not big enough to be concerned with, but they could also burst, cause pain and bleeding...same old story. He said that he was sorry and that he would give me more medicine (which I don't need). I just wanted to make sure it wasn't anything big because I am going out of town. I am happy to know it isn't, but it just sucks that this is how it is.

So...I was GOING to stop the post there and be all like woe is me. Then I got a call from the second pharmacy. The one with the three final prescriptions for the IVF (first half the the Rx story is here). She said I had a balance of....$80. I thought she would say for one medicine, but no. That was it. Total. I asked how much the medicine would cost me if my insurance was not covering it. She laughed and said "A lot!" She told me that one of the drugs usually runs around $2000, but that Doc had put me on a higher dose and that mine was $3400...for just ONE of the medicines! The other two would have brought my total up over $4000. I paid a grand total of $117 for all my meds. I gotta say, saving $4000 kinda takes the sting out of this bad day!

Just Me?

I really want to see the new Pixar movie Wall-E. I truly do. I have heard nothing but amazing reviews and am hoping to actually bring my godson while we are on vacation in Florida next week. Still...I feel the need to point out the large elephant in the movie. Does anybody else see that this little guy...
looks a hell of a lot like THIS little guy!Or maybe I am the only dork around who actually remembers the movie Short Circuit...but how could anybody forget the 80's classic with "Number Five... IS ALIVE!!" ?? Seriously as soon as I saw a preview for Wall-E I was thinking, "weird...Pixar is remaking Short Circuit? No...wait...this doesn't seem to be about Johnny Five at all! Man, people are going to go CRAZY with all the robot stealing!" And yet...I have heard nothing. NOTHING! Nobody remembers poor Johnny...just look into his sweet face...

but then again...this one is pretty stinking cute too.



Yep...going to have to so see this little guy on vacation...even if he did steal his look from my favorite 80's robot.

The Pool

My entire life I wanted a pool. I have clear memories of driving our neighbors who actually had a pool completely mad begging to go swimming...Come to think of it, that is a little embarrassing. I guess they knew what they were getting in to when they became the only house on the street with one...so I blame them really. Anyway, today was the day we got to go swimming in this...

Nick's dad has put in an in ground pool at his house. All my childhood dreams have come true! I have lived in apartments with pools, and I used them. They are nice, but there is something about having your very own pool. (Or your father in law having his very own pool because Nick and I are far from putting one in ourselves...)

We of course brought Ellie with us so she could try it out as well. She was all about the diving board. Not jumping off it...just sitting there while we swam up to her and said hi. She did eventually get in, but preferred to float around the pool on a raft rather than actually swim.

Yes we spoil her and may be ready for a baby, but the entire family has a pretty great day at the pool!

A Bust

So night before last I had...and incident. Nick was at his sleep study to test him with the machine. It did not go well. He said there was no way he could sleep and came home at 4:30. Anyway, When Nick is gone I have a hard time falling asleep. I am not afraid, but I guess I am a touch anxious. Anyway, I was up pretty late, and I was exhausted. I had high hopes of just passing out. I get into the bed, roll over...and it hits me. This TERRIBLE pain in my abdomen. I immediately pull my legs up because it seemed like it might help. I could hardly stand as I made my way to the bathroom. I thought maybe I had some kind of food poisoning, but I didn't feel that kinda sick. I went back to bed, got my heating pad and my pain medicine and laid back down.

The pain was extremely similar to when I am in the throws on my period with my endometriosis cramping, but I just got off my period on Saturday and started the BC on Sunday. It is day FIVE of this cycle! I seriously rolled around the idea of the ER. I mean, who's to say that one of these days I am not going to have serious abdominal pain, take pain meds and go to sleep, and then have my appendix burst! I decided to take my pain meds, and stay awake to see if the pain gets worse. It remained constant (and hurt so bad I couldn't set my hands on my stomach... seriously, it was terrible) but I eventually passed out at four.

Yesterday morning I started bleeding. What. the. hell. I called my fertility doc, but he was out of town. Then I called my regular GYN. The nurse seemed very concerned and actually called the doc in surgery! He said that with my history of cysts, and with all the hormones I had been on, that he was pretty sure I had a nice large cyst develop, then the BC repressed all hormones...therefor making THE CYST BURST. It all fit. The sudden sharp horrible pain, the lingering dull pain, the bleeding. He said if I am not better today to call and he wants to see me, but he really thinks it is a cyst burst, so to rest and take my pain medications (and rest I did...I came home and got in bed at 5:30...Nick woke me up and I ate dinner at 10:30, then went back to bed until morning). I am feeling better. I am sure he was right. Still, how much can one girl take. I mean, I get the endo, which sucks. Then the endo leads to infertility, which sucks. NOW the infertility is leading to terrible pain as cysts rupture in the night? There has to be a limit where things just officially become unfair...

Some Good News

Do you all know how much the drugs for IVF cost? Not the IVF itself, just the prescriptions. I didn't. I truly never gave it a lot of thought. If you asked me, I would say I assumed "a lot". I actually asked Boo, and (hope you don't mind me sharing) she said hers were about $3000. Did you hear me. THREE THOUSAND DOLLARS. For MEDICATIONS! You can't even get the medications at a normal pharmacy. Doc had to call it in and then they would contact me to set up shipping and payments.

I had decided it was worth a try to have them run the drugs through my insurance. I have wonderful insurance, and have been lucky enough to have all the Clomid, estrogen, progesterone, and injections for the IUI's covered. I am not sure how common that is, but I was pleasantly surprised by it (and by pleasantly surprised I mean shocked and thrilled). When the pharmacist called I asked if she could look into my insurance coverage. She asked me if I have fertility coverage. I tell her that I don't have full coverage, but that it has covered all medications so far, as well as all ultrasounds and doctors visits. It is not covering anything for Nick (obviously...and I didn't tell her that, I am just telling you all) and the actual IUI transfers.

She put me on hold to call my insurance company. I am not going to lie, she sounded very skeptical. I actually felt a little bad for making her call. She didn't SAY there was no point, but there was something in her sigh that led me to believe it. Anyway, she got back on the phone and gave me the breakdown....Doc called me in seven different medications. (that's right). Three of the seven were not covered through this pharmacy, but would be covered at this other magical pharmacy. They will fax them the order and they will call me. The other four were covered here. She starts naming them along with the number of pills or injections for each...medication one...$3...(I get a little excited...great start!) medication two...$3 (I actually laugh out loud a little...) medication three...$6 (my heart skips a beat)...medication four...the big one of the four...$15 (I die just a little). She then says I need needles and syringes...she adds that in...and of course I must pay for the Fed Ex shipping...so the grand totally for the first four of the seven IVF drugs with shipping and needles...$37. THIRTY SEVEN DOLLARS. TOTAL.

Now, I still need to talk to the other pharmacy, but they said it would be covered. I could have a $40 copay per pill or shot or something, but still...I mean, this could still get expensive, but I just cannot tell you how excited we are to have some of this being paid. The $3000 for drugs is a fourth of the total cost of IVF. The idea that we could get a large chunk of that paid just means that if it doesn't work, we can do it again sooner...we can do it again EVER. Three thousand dollars...and so far I have paid thirty seven. I am just waiting for the other shoe to drop...I will let you know what the total for the last three turns out to be, but for now, I will enjoy the idea of thirty seven! Looks like the ads on Bio Girl (which really are coming as soon as they give me the code) might pay for at least the medications!

Getting (Wii) Fit

I have a problem with exercise. Seriously, I was blessed to have been a naturally thin child and young adult and I believe this little gift made me extremely lazy when it comes to making myself work out. Yes I ran track in middle school (covered that in my 100 things...) but that is about the end of my athletic achievements. Over the years I made several attempts to get fit. I will share the list with you in bullet form...

• I joined a gym back around the time I first started to put on a little weight. I felt that I could nip this problem right in the bud....take control! I went all out when joining this gym, so rather than just go with a month to month plan...I signed up and paid in advance for an entire year...and I paid even more because I wanted the lifetime members discount to go along with it. Pay more now, then pay less FOREVER!! Genius. I believe I used my membership religiously for a few weeks, while hating every second of it. I then only showed my face at the gym for the tanning bed. I never went in for the next years discounted rate, and when I recently had the small desire to being working out again, I noticed my gym has closed down...so sad.

• I decided to take up swimming. I was laying out a lot over the summer at a friends pool, so I bought myself some goggles...because I was really serious about this. I was going to swim thirty laps a day to start. Ten each of breast stroke, back stroke and free style. I was on the swim team for about a week when I was little, so I knew the routine. If I remember correctly I made it down and back one time before climbing out of the pool and getting back to laying out. I have not had the goggles back on since. I do still keep them in my pool bag just in case I get the urge again...it could happen.

• I decided I was going to become a runner. (this one is recent...like maybe three months old). We have a 5K run here in our city on the 4th of July, so I was going to begin training and then run in the race. One day I got all my workout clothes on, did a little stretching, set my ipod to the "get pumped" play list and hit the pavement. I made it about 60 seconds into the first song before I had to hit the inhaler. I managed to do a 60 seconds running, two minutes walking and catching my breath rotation for a full 30 minutes! I was very proud of my start to a lifetime of running. I never ran again...

So...when I got the Wii Fit I was pumped. Super pumped...but I gotta tell ya, I have been pumped about exercise before. Then I get started actually working out and realize it is really fucking hard work!! I thought there was a small chance that I might actually enjoy the Wii Fit because it was in my own home, therefore requiring little extra effort, and it was interactive. I must say that I was totally right. I LOVE the Wii Fit. I have worked out more in the past two weeks than I have since that final county championship in eighth grade.

I am seriously addicted. The game has four options for workout: yoga, strength exercises, aerobics, and balance. I do the yoga everyday. It isn't that stressful on my body, but I can definitely tell a difference from just the two weeks of use! I then try to rotate the aerobics (which seriously...the advance step and the super hula hoop...I am totally out of breath and in need of an inhaler...sad but true) and the strength training (which...a push up..I simply cannot do one...and on some of them I am shaking so bad I would be HORRIFIED for anyone but Nick to see it. He has been nice enough to keep the laughing to a minimum:) ) but I really enjoy the aerobics so much more than the strength training, so I am kinda drawn in that direction. They also have balance exercises, which are really fun, but honestly not a workout in the same way as the rest.

So, the point is that I love it. I am using it for at least thirty minutes a day, and I really think we will both continue to use it. An added perk to the entire thing is that we have had people over a few times since we bought it, and it is really fun with a group too! You haven't seen anything until you see a fairly drunk average size guy swinging his hips like mad trying to get to 800 rotations on Super Hula Hoop! I love it. Nick loves it. It was worth every penny of the $90. If you have a Wii, got out and get one! If you don't have a Wii...pick that up too. Hours and hours of healthy entertainment!

**Chic Shopper Chick...does this sound familiar? Yes, you inspired this entire post with our emails....thanks!!

**I should also mention that Boo also joined the gym with the lifetime membership (with some pushing from me) and bought a pair of goggles for the laps...what we try, we try together!